💗 KINDNESS
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” – Ian Maclaren
Kindness is the gentle path through the ADHD jungle—the one that reminds us we don’t need to be perfect to be good. For ADHDers, who often carry the burden of being misunderstood, misjudged, or mislabeled, kindness can be both a balm and a beacon.
Many of us have internalised harshness. We’ve been told to “try harder,” “stop being lazy,” or “grow up.” Over time, this can become the voice we use on ourselves. But kindness breaks that cycle. It says: “What if I could speak to myself the way I speak to the people I love?”
Kindness is not weakness. It’s radical. It shows up in pauses, in patience, in how we treat others when we’re overwhelmed or under-resourced. It’s in the texts we send, the grace we offer, the boundaries we hold with care. It’s in how we treat the parts of ourselves that are still learning.
For ADHDers, kindness also means not hiding behind humour or performance, but showing up with sincerity—even if we forget things, speak out of turn, or feel all the feelings at once. Kindness makes room for messy humanity, and invites others to do the same.
🧭 The HOPE Trail Map
- Helps or Harms: Is this voice in my head kind—or just familiar?
- Own My Values: I want to be someone who chooses gentleness—not because life is easy, but because I know how hard it can be.
- People and Pursuits: Who brings out my kindness without demanding I be smaller? What actions remind me that kindness is strength?
- Enact and Evaluate: Today, I’ll do one small kind thing—for myself or someone else—without expecting anything in return.
⚠️ Trail Challenges
- Past criticism can harden our inner tone, making kindness feel foreign or indulgent.
- Sensory or emotional overload may trigger snappy reactions.
- Shame may block our ability to believe we deserve kindness.
🪧 Trail Markers: Small Steps Toward Kindness
- Offer a soft word to yourself after a slip-up: “You’re learning. You’re still good.”
- Pause before reacting—ask, “Can kindness fit here?”
- Do something nurturing with no agenda: a drink of water, a hug, a kind message.
🔥 Campfire Questions for Reflection
- Where in my life do I most need kindness—and what would that look like?
- How does it feel when someone treats me with softness, not scrutiny?
- What might change if I made kindness a practice, not just a feeling?
Kindness doesn’t mean having no edges. It means holding your edges with care—and treating yourself and others like we’re all still becoming.
